Christmas Time.....

Recently I have been working on Christmas stuff for the worship team and our yearly Christmas Eve service. I have been scouring the internet and praying and racking my brain on how to make this Christmas service not just another service but an encounter with God. You know Christmas and Easter are every churches opportunity to reach those who only come to church once or twice a year. It's funny how you learn through little experiences. So i have been you tubing and goggling and searching and searching and praying and all that stuff that a "good worship leader" does. Today i am sitting in my classroom, not sure I mentioned that i am teaching but i was prompted by the Holy spirit to just stop. Well i don't know about you but when God says stop i do really try to listen, It was so strange because i have been trying and trying and trying and all i heard was STOP!!!!! So amongst all the business that my job entails i began to just kind of meditate on the word Stop, lol one word i know how do you do that well...... I have recently learned that meditation is a necessary spiritual discipline( little plug for the leadership training class at the church :) I think i just rambled :) lol so in meditating i began to think with the holiday season coming and you know all the hustle and bustle of it all. How many of us Stop and enjoy it? How many of us Stop and spend the season enjoying our family and friends, isn't that what it's for. We spend so much money and time and energy looking for that perfect gift when really the perfect gift is of course Jesus but along side Jesus precious time with the ones we love. One of my dear friends said the other day Christmas was her favorite time of the year. For me the last few years not so much, I think because i worried about money and what and when and where and how. This christmas i intend to enjoy my family and the season. So in that meditation i believe God has given me an awesome Christmas Service designed specifically by him. So excited to experience this season with Jesus and my family. SO I LOVE CHRISTMAS :)

Refreshing

It's amazing how refreshing one act of love or two minutes of your time can be. I was reminded last evening of how important relationships are. In the very busiest of times it is so important to cultivate relationships around you. To cherish and honor the people in your court. Life deals all kind of crazy blows, sometimes so painful the wind escapes your body and you feel like you can't breathe. But then in the stillest and loneliest of times the breath of God breathes through a friend or your Pastor or someone who knows the very inner secrets and still loves you. It's at those times that we forget to stop and be thankful. So many times our focus is on the people who hurt us or those who don't "like" us we forgot how important the ones that do "like" us are. I know in my own life a lot of the time my Husband takes the brunt of my outburst. To his credit i am not always the easiest person to deal with I can be very emotional and a bit irrational ( did i just say that out-loud ;) lol ) God has every so graciously showed me over the last month that my Husband is for me and sometimes i need to shut up and Listen ( another thing i probably shouldn't have said out-loud ). In his wisdom i have learned that letting him in and listening is so much easier than trying to deal with all the hurt myself. Wow amazing lesson after almost 14 years of marriage:). I think the most refreshing thing to me is that when i sit in the quiet no matter how much it hurts i get the peace that can only come from the one who really knows my heart and loves me even more. Recently We took a class at church on Spiritual Disciplines, so yes after being a christian for most of my life i finally understand why we are supposed to read our bible, meditate and pray :) woo-hoooo. Practicing these things consistently over the last few weeks has shown me so much about my self that i really wasn't aware of. Emotional me ???? UMMM yes :) Anger um maybe a little:) While i am able to recognize the negative i also am able to see the strengths and have begun to realize why those areas i struggle with are there. The most amazing part is the freedom you feel when you are able to look at yourself and really know who you are. The chains are gone and freedom blows in like a hurricane wind. Does the hurt leave um not all of it but a new skin comes that is tougher and a little less easy to penetrate. Hurt will always be inevitable but God's perfect love and affection makes it tolerable. I am so amazed at some of the revelation God has been giving me over the last month. It's ok to be me even if there are people who don't like me, it's ok to be me even when people you love walk away, it's ok to be me because there will be people who need what God put in me to give. IT"S OK TO BE ME!!!!!!!

Inspired......

Well it has been along time since i wrote on here. I must say I got a little inspired by my sister in law who has been posting some as of late. It was always so refreshing to share and "vent" for lack of a better word on here ;). So much has changed since i read the posts that are already on here. Johnnie and i have been married 13 years now and have been honored to lead worship at NHC for almost three years (I think). My son Emry is now 13 (WOW) and going into the eighth grade. Maya just turned 12 and is going into the 7th grade. Amazing how much we have walked through or should i say how much God has carried us through. So many times i think if i could go back would i change it. Probably depends on which day you ask me what the answer will be. But as we continue on the course placed before us, I have learned so much, so i don't think i would trade any of it. Even some of the hurt has shaped and molded me into who i am. I won't pretend that i have it all together cause i don't but i will give myself props for waking up every day with God's purpose for my life in mind. Some days i fail miserably but i won't stop getting up and trying. This journey called life that all of us are taking is filled with so many bumps and bruises along the way but i believe every bump and bruise build character and integrity along the way.